Frozen corpses putting out the paper

Heating pad on chair
Office is miserable
Cannot feel my feet

Knitting: love it, hate it

Looping, knotting yarn
Oh God! What have I done wrong?
Just want a sweater

I have way too many logins on way too many sites

World Wide Web so big
Password list out of control
Need brain chip upgrade

All hopped up on Advil Cold and Sinus, Delsym cough syrup and Lunesta

I cough all night long
Head is a big snot machine
Little germ so strong

That just ain't right, man.

Cat full of kisses
You show me that you love me.
Wait. You lick your butt.

How did they enjoy their icy cold Coca-Colas in the ancient days?

Refrigerator
How you keep my food so cold
Brokenness hurts me

Inspired by the recent haiku activity on Fashion-Incubator

Sewing all night long
bleary eyes blur my mistakes
next day's light is harsh



See more here.

My cat is in a turf war

Cartoon cat fighting
Vicious ball rolling around
What's territory?

You'd think they'd never seen a woman before...

Cafeteria
That is full of creepy men
Quit staring at me

Amy's got a scary arachnid, just in time for Halloween

pointy orange spider!
i think you're staring at me,
sharpening your fangs.



submitted by Amy, who wrote this terrifying blog item.
Followed by this one.

BareMinerals and I don't get along

Stupid swirl, tap, buff
New makeup ruined my skin
Ugly, bumpy face

I fear barn owls

Eerie, scary bird
With a face as white as snow
Barn owl stay away

Hottest temps in San Diego in years, just when I arrive

Sweaty, sticky shirt
Heat wave hits San Diego
Got there just in time

Story of my life, though this was written at the chiropractor recently

How my damn neck hurts!
Headaches plague my existence
Snap! Crack! to wellness

Someone at work gave me an apple that looked like it was from a backyard tree:

Little apple gift
I only eat fruit from stores
Thank you, anyway

A tall man needs much sustenance:

Jeff was inspired by his mac and cheese. He came up with the first one, to which I said that I couldn't write the F-word in front of T-Shirt Face. So he wrote an alternative. I chose to bleep out and still publish the first, in the name of free(ish) speech and because I realized one finds revelation, sincerity and the deepest truths of the universe buried within the oral tissues. His pain is your gain.


So boiling hot
Ouch! Burns on my f---ing mouth!
Stupid bargain buy


When cooled down and thick
Mac and cheese is a delight
Especially two

Regarding my newspaper...

Forty-inch story
Vying to be the longest
Readers bored to tears

Chickenbone Jones sez:

"haha! i have a haiku response to your latest poem! but probably nobody would get it except you and me, and maybe my dad:


wait, i know that line!
don't forget the new phone books,
or the paddleball!"

My dad, er, T-Shirt Face, will get it too! Maybe our dads should be friends. They're probably about the same age. Why don't you boys go outside and play or something?

Sometimes when I get off work at midnight, there's a person stomping coke cans in the parking lot. It makes me afraid.

`Creepy Can Crusher'
In the Journal parking lot
He must hate those cans



Gay limo driver
Skipping toward me at stoplight
`Where iz cazino?'


Fluffy, fluffy cat
Roasting in the summer heat
Ready with my fork

T-shirt face strikes again with the loo talk

Oh man look at that
Looks like it, smells like it too
Better watch your step